Na erkanavey intha kelvi few ppl kita ketu iruken chat la. These are some of the responses :
1. Get in a relationship with someone who is better than your EX.
2. Get drunk.
3. Go to the gym and workout like mad.
4. Watch porn and fap.
5. Avanga munadi happy ah valnthu katunga.
I don't agree with some of these suggestions.
1. Get in a relationship with someone who is better than your EX. ->As I mentioned above, being shattered and broken we should work on healing ourselves instead of jumping on a new relationship blindly to mend our wounds.
2. Get drunk. -> How effective will this be? Why should you harm your liver? It will leave a long-term addiction to alcohol. Besides, namala erkanavei mentally emotianally vali kuduthutu poitanga nama extra va psychically vali kudakanuma namakey.
3. Go to the gym and workout like mad. -->Yeah, this is a good thing to do. Focus on ourselves. Namma la vitutu ponathuku nama kula avalo anger irukum antha anger lam channel pana working out will be a great way out. Become the hot sexy version of you for yourself.
4. Watch porn and fap. --> Ithuvum oru short term ku vena work agalam but eventually, it will become an unhealthy addiction. So ethuku.
5. Avanga munadi happy ah valnthu katunga.
--> Nama namakaga than happy ah irukanum, ponavanga kaga lam deliberate ah happy ah katika theiva ila.
Work inum mudiyala but I just want to express my opinion since I'm in the mood to write
First of all, healing is never an easy process. One day you might like you have healed, the other day you might feel like you're shattered into pieces. The post-breakup period is literally equivalent to grieving. It can be either grieving for the person who left you or grieving for the person you were before you get into this mess.
Now why should you heal???
1. You will be dying in agony whereas the other person would have moved on happily with another person within a split of second as though you never existed in the first place. Seeing this might make you wonder if whatever you had and shared with them was all basically a lie.
You literally might feel like you have been living inside a bubble and the bubble got popped.
The amount of anger and agony basically will affect you mentally, emotionally and physically. If you're from a conservative family you will not have the option to share your agony with your family and all you got do is bottle up your feelings and burst out into tears.
We might think our family isn't aware that we're suffering in silence but in actual we're hurting them indirectly by hurting ourselves.
Therefore, yaaro oruthar namala vitunu ponuthuku we shouldn't neglect our parents and focus on our pain and hurt them.
Sari ivalo solriyei apo ena than panlamnu kepinga itho solren
1. Share your pain with someone you trust, it can be your friend family or anyone you can open up to. Apdi yarum ilati do not hesitate to get professional help, let it be a counselor, psychologist or psychiatrist share it with them avanga profession is to listen to others problem. So no worries they won't judge you. You will feel better after you have shared it.
2. Focus on ways to ease the pain and anger. You can workout, paint, dance and do anything you like.
3. Do not isolate yourself, don't stay alone in a room. Spend time with your family/friends. Because thaniya iruntha thoughts will hunt so avoid solitude at any cost.
4. Don't beat yourself up. You might feel angry with yourself for getting into this mess, enada nama thalaila namaley maanu vari potukitomnu. Instead of criticizing ourselves, focus on the lesson you have learned from this experience. You might have learned about yourself, apram namaku intha mari character set agathu/agum ipdi pala visyam antha anubuvam kathu koduthu irukum. So ithuku apram epdi intha lesson apply panlamnu parunga. Believe ela bad scenario ku pinadi etho oru nalathu iruka poguthu.
5. Yes we might have lots of unanswered questions about what and why it has happened the way it did. Intha questions ku lam answer venum nu ketkathinga because trust me they will not have any valid answers. Closure kudakati namaku kasthama than irukum. Ena achu etha achu ethuku achu nu onum puriyathu but ethavathu iruntha thana solvanga ethum solati sari than pogatum solitu nama polapu parthutu poitey iruka vendithan.
6. Ithuku munadi we might have given importance and attention to this one particular person and we might have neglected our family, career and friends. So take the opportunity to rebuild the relationship with your family and friends. Rebuild your career. Enroll into courses/classes/ training etc to develop you professionally and personally. Focus on your personal and professional growth. Keep your mind occupied so that thoughts abt him/her doesn't cross your mind.
7. If you have trouble sleeping post-breakup, try listening to hypnosis audios. Don't depend on sleeping tablets.
8. Forgiving the person can also help you heal. Yes, it's not easy to forgive them after everything they did to you but you have to forgive them for your own peace of mind. Holding onto grudges and anger will eat you up.
9. Take your time to heal. Become the best version of yourself. Stronger emotionally, sexier/hotter physically and smarter mentally. There's plenty of fishes in the ocean and you deserve the best.
Inimel ipadi oru vali anubivakanuma yosichu adutha oru relationship ula poratha iruntha ponga. But takunu dress change panra mari partners change panathinga. Focus on yourself and your healing.